What a whirlwind of a week. I lost my job this week. I was working full time remotely, so the news came in the form of a random Microsoft team’s meeting. And the crazy part is it was 100% unexpected. Over time the company grew and grew with investment after investment. In January of this year our multi state department was merged under one supervisor and 2 new and very different software systems. The last 9 months has been a mental health struggle bus for me. And while I previously didn’t talk much about it, now that I am not employed anymore, I am going to be honest to help with the perspective I have. The last 9 months has had a new challenge attached to each workday.
While I was picked for the lay off by someone within the company (I don't truly know who picked me), I can’t help but say I was picked by God. He saw how tired, overworked and mentally exhausted I was from this year at the job.
I recently started this blog and my journey to try to promote products I love as my creative outlet, and God prepared me in every way he could. When I started my blog, I started digging deep into my mental health. I started the blog to talk about my past life seasons that brought me to where I am today (with hopes of inspiring others), but in the backburner of my life was my current mental health struggle in the form of my job. The week after I started my blog, I had a huge mental health breakdown due to some events that took place. God brought me through it. Things were looking up again, but I can't stop saying how thankful I am for the fire being lit within me to get this blog journey started. Without digging deep and recognizing what helps my mental health thrive, I am not sure I would have gotten through this week and be "okay".
This week I knew I needed to stick to my bible study, get as much rest as I could (when my mind would shut off), stay active in my creative outlets and continue showing up with my beauty and wellness products! I did all the things to stay afloat mentally. But I am human, and I did struggle with the “losing control” aspect of being laid off. When you are laid off, the control you have over your life is stripped momentarily. Yes, I can and will get another job, but let's stop and talk about it for a minute. I’ve invested all of my time and efforts into this job for the last 3 years, specifically with the last 9 months being a huge undertaking. I can't count the amount of times I said to my coworkers that I was just ready to have my normal life back. I had given my all to do my very best each and every day. I’ve had a few people say this week, ah just go get you another job. But is it really that simple? When you are not expecting to lose your job, it’s a hard pill to swallow. You lose control over your life and what your daily routine is like. I’ve had the same routine now for the last year of working full time from home. Losing control over my income and daily life has been the hardest part. We were living a life molded to what my income was providing so to find "another job" means I have to find something with at least the same exact pay (or more - I am officially seeking more because I know my worth). With the losing control aspect, it doesn’t help that for my very last job, I was laid off too. In April 2020, I was very pregnant and due to have Hudson any day but was laid off due to “Covid-19”. So 3 years ago, when I started this job that I was just laid off from it was after a job loss. To find myself in this place again is hard. I know God will open a door for me. I know we will be okay. He did it before and he will do it again. The unknown is scary, but I am here praying, trusting & waiting for the perfect door to open! I've always felt God puts a mountain in my path during my valley seasons so I can show others that mountain can be moved.
I have to make sure I point this out......The one amazing thing about the jobs I have lost, I have gained some amazing friendships! We aren't meant to do life alone and I am so thankful for the friends that have come and stayed in my life. Much love you guys! ;)
While busy reading God's word this week for my bible study, a light bulb went off. Although I feel like I lost control in my life, it really never was mine. It was our Lord and Savior's control. Jesus Christ is the cornerstone of our life. God created a foundation for us and through the apostles and prophets creating the divine revelations in their teaching it was laid out for us to learn from them. The Bible describes Jesus as the cornerstone and that His church would be built upon. He is foundational. Once the cornerstone was set, it became the basis for determining every measurement in the remaining construction; everything was aligned to it. As the cornerstone of the building of the church, Jesus is our standard of measure and alignment.
Whatever is built in alignment with him will be right and true. So it is not up to us to make sure our life is aligned, and everything measures up. That is God’s control through Jesus Christ. While I may feel like I lost control (it is a natural feeling and okay to go through) I didn’t because it has been His all along. Ephesians 2:19-22 tells us about Jesus himself being the chief cornerstone.
Ephesians 2:19-22 NIV Consequently, you are no longer foreigners and strangers, but fellow citizens with God’s people and also members of his household, built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, with Christ Jesus himself as the chief cornerstone.
Even on my weakest days, I am praising God in thankfulness. He knows our heart desires and I truly believe he was the one that picked me to be laid off. He has a great adventure ahead for me!
I hope after this blog post you are left encouraged to seek out what helps your mental health. Having my key list and being able to check all of my boxes this week has been so important. It is the reason I am doing “okay” at the end of week one of being laid off. Check out my last blog post for more on mental health and ways to make your list so you can check your boxes too!
In the meantime, of waiting on the right door to open for me, I am pursuing as many passive income streams as possible that I already was working on previously with my blog. The first being Amazon affiliate links. When you see me post any Amazon links within my blog post or socials, please know I will make a small commission when you purchase from my link, but it is at no extra charge to you!
Since this blog post is a continued message on mental health, I have added some adorable mental health awareness + helpful items below! Buy for yourself or send to someone you know that may be struggling with mental health, a hardship or life stressor and currently needs a pick-me up!
Please note when you click on the item, it should open the item up in Amazon!
All My Best,
Kim
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